Tex-Mex in DC?

Up until a few years ago, I was quite enraptured with the Tex-Mex scene in the DC metro area. Then one day, this guy from California came to work at my job and slowly but surely made me re-think what constitutes good Tex-Mex (or just plain Mexican) food. He worked in the closet office next to mine and would talk all day, sometimes spewing radical political comments that made me nervous. But a recurring element of our conversations were about the quality of Tex-Mex. One day, he made the bold statement: There is no good Tex-Mex in this area. Coming from California, he would glow when recounting the bounty of options he had back home. I would counter that, citing Lauriol Plaza or Cactus Cantina. I would defend Guapo's and Rio Grande. I would talk about Rosa Mexicano. Even the burrito man in the vendor cart outside of our building was impressive to me. Still is. But some of the other places I have listed? Not as impressed as I used to be. His subtle attempts to waver my allegiances worked somewhat.

I still tend to pick a place based on the salsa and chips. Very important. The thinner and crispier the chips, the better. And, they must arrive to the table warm. Salsa I am not as picky about, but can recall some awful experiences at places like Chevy's. Guapo's salsa is chunkier, and tastes extremely fresh. Most of the other places blend their salsa into a smooth, easily scoop-able consistency. Another critical item to me is the tortilla. Some places bring freshly baked tortillas to the table for free. The best, in my humble opinion, are the flour ones. Rosa Mexicano's barely pliable, small and flat tortillas would make better coasters than food wrappers. Maybe it's because they use corn instead of flour? Maybe because it seems more gourmet? Not sure, but no thanks. Aside from that, they do have some unique, albeit overpriced, tasty items on their menu. It also seems that the guacamole scene has exploded in recent years. Back in the day, guacamole was just a side condiment to a main entree, and sometimes it didn't make an appearance at all. Now, most places have the added flair of making guacamole table side as an appetizer. Love it.

When I was middle-school aged, my family and I would head to Rio Grande a lot. The home-made tortillas, pillowy and soft, that came fresh out of the oven were addictive. The sights of steam and the sound of sizzling hot metal plates made my mouth water in anticipation of the arriving tray of food. One of the first few times we were there, my dad was in the process of finishing his meal when he took the big hot pepper garnish, thinking it was part of his meal, and bit off everything but the stem, chewed quickly and swallowed. I thought he was going to die. I've never seen someone sweat so much and breathe with such pain and panic. He downed glass of water after glass of water (which we now know only makes it worse) to no avail. The waiters came over, maybe even the manager--some of it was a blur--to come to his aid. I forget how long it took for his red face to regain normal flesh tones, but it seemed like an eternity. If only they had brought him a glass of milk and some bread to neutralize the pepper's heat. If only he had recognized danger before wolfing it down whole.

As Cinco de Mayo approaches, I've started thinking of where to celebrate. I want to try something new. I need to find a new go-to place. My friend Sheri raves about a place called Coyote Grill out in Fairfax. I will have to give that a try. Or maybe I just need to find a new menu item. When I don't pick enchiladas, I choose to fill up on Mexican rice, free flour tortillas and chips/salsa. The majority of the times I have been out for this type of food, I'm underwhelmed by the lack of flavor depth. Bland, bland, go away, come again another day. I want a big, juicy burrito, smothered in cheese, stuffed with a marriage of flavors and textures. I'd like to taste an enchilada with similar attributes.

I guess I shouldn't be so quick to judge the Tex-Mex options in this area. I do have to say, though, that Austin Grill is on my never-again list and Mi Rancho is dangerously close to a good nixing. I need to restore my faith in what used to be my favorite food genre. My love for the margarita has also been spurned. The frozen kind give me freeze headaches and the marg on the rocks seem too syrupy and overwhelmed by an artificial sour mix. Tia Queta in Bethesda does have a decent margarita (and they make theirs extra strong). Not to mention, aside from their abysmal chips and salsa, their chicken mole is fantastic.

I'm officially on the hunt. Time to bring back some love for DC's Tex-Mex food and margaritas. I hope to have some good news soon. But until then, here's my list of acceptable places in ranked order:

Lauriol Plaza
Oyamel
Cactus Cantina
Guapo's
Tortilla Coast